Since everyone thinks that I live in a fantasy, I have to clear this up with you guys because my life is pretty bizarre after 'someone' in the family decided to sneak out of the house and had an affair with another man for about a year and a half when my dad, James, was working in the States.The worst thing was nobody knew about it until August 6th, 2014-the day when my dad came home from the States.
August 6th, 2014- the most dramatic and chaotic night in my family. It was really heart wrenching to watch my parents getting into an intense fight as they were yelling at each other and their words were as sharp as knifes as I wasn't there with them. I was pretending to fall asleep in my room but I left my door slightly ajar to keep an ear on them in case of anything bad happens. As their fight had gotten more intense, all my mother could do was just to protect the man she made out with-the one that had broken the trust and lost the spark in my parent's marriage. Thing's were definitely not easy that night. I could still remember how my dad slammed the table and screamed at my mom to never come back.
While my mom was packing her stuffs to leave at the living room, I've finally decided to pluck out my courage to walk out of my room. Both of them were shocked to see my appearance in the living room as it was really late that time. My dad was sobbing hard while mom was packing. I inced closer to her and kneeled down in front of her while sobbing and begged for her to stay, but, all she said to me was just, "Jane, this is for your own good", in her raging tone. Well, at that point, I was too young to judge how my parents handle their relationship as I was just thirteen. Eventually, I got up from my knees and watched her leave while she handed a letter of her reasons-which was never opened by anyone of us at home, and left me with my tears streaming down.
Everything happened at a speed of light and every single detail are still running around clearly in my mind about that incident that happened that night. Ever since that incident. dad's mood swings an temper had gotten worse. My dad kept on repeating about how both of them shared most of their firsts' together ever since they met each other in high school. Imagine the pain and dread my dad went through when my mom's lawyer sent their divorce letter to our house. Dad had a tough time if he should sign the divorce letter that was already signed my mom. Sigh, but he still signed it anyway.
Remember that I've mentioned about how my dad's mood swing's and temper had gotten worse? He comes home drunk every night and usually, I'm his victim for him to release his anger-by hitting me with his leather belt and sometimes, even worse, with a shattered beer bottle. It hurts! But it'd hurt me even more to see how he transform from a caring father to an insane dad. He would hit me as if he already plotted a murder on me every time he turns into a beast. Usually on the day after I got hit, I would still go to school with my bruised body and unhealed scars from the shattered beer bottle. There was never a time I'm worried about my scars and bruises in school because I've never been noticed, like, at all.
1st September 2014- I went to school and came home as usual and I noticed an envelope on my study desk when I was about to unpack my books. I opened it and it was a letter from mom. 90% of the ltter was smudged with water droplets-I suspected that mom must have cried while she wrote the letter. The tear drops smeared most of the words and luckily, there were still a few words left visible.
"Happy Sweet 13th Birthday, Jane! I'm sorry that I couldn't celebrate your birthday with you this year. Take care.
Love, Mom."
Although those were the only words that were visible on the letter, I knew that my mother still loves me. Since it's my birthday that day, I waited for my dad to come home and take me out for dinner that night. Surprising enough, he brought me to a ultimate high class restaurant nearby and he was in a really good mood as well. He even ordered a slice of red velvet cake-which tasted a little weird that night, but it is still my favourite. Also, he even gifted me a bouquet of roses. I was really shocked and surprised!
Not long after we finished dinner, we left the place and walked home. While we were on our way home, I felt giddy and out of breath as if I had drugs. I called out to my dad who was busy talking on his phone, for help but words did not come out from my mouth. And the next moment, I passed out.
I went into a deep sleep with no signs to wake up.
Well, I suppose my dad is a beast that actually plotted a murder to kill me on my birthday.After all- he had planned it so well that he actually gifted me a bouquet of black roses. Question is,was it for my birthday or my planned murder?
I hope that I'm in a better place right now.